My Decoys Lie Better Than Your Ex Tee

At least the decoys help you bring home birds. Wear this to the blind while the plastic ducks do their job better than your last relationship did.

The plastic ducks have shown up, stayed where you put them, and contributed to dinner. That is a frankly outstanding relationship history compared with several real adults you could name.

Wear it for pre-dawn coffee, the trip to the blind, or telling the same duck story until somebody begs for mercy. The decoys can keep lying. At least their bullshit has a useful fucking purpose.

The details

• Relaxed, loose-fit crewneck tee.
• 100% cotton, 260 gsm (7.7 oz); substantial feel with a soft, breathable finish.
• Small branded front print and full-size graphic on the back.
• Available in Wine Red, White, White Gray, Black, Navy Blue and Dark Gray.

Made to order: your piece is created after checkout, so we are not sitting on piles of shit nobody asked for.

Care: Machine wash cold or at 30°C on gentle. Do not bleach. Tumble dry low. Iron on low, avoiding the print. Do not dry clean.

Size guide

Measurements are of the garment laid flat, in inches. Chest is measured across the front. Compare with a tee you already own for the best fit. Measurements may vary slightly.