{"product_id":"essential-cotton-t-shirt-31","title":"Soggy Beaver BBQ Smoke-and-Bad-Decisions Tee","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe smoker’s fired up, the cooler’s open, and someone has already made the beaver joke. Congratulations—you found the cookout where nobody’s pretending to be classy.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThe barbecue smells fantastic. The conversation has the maturity level of a middle-school lunch table. At least somebody remembered the napkins and knows when to pull the meat off the smoker.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eWear it to cookouts, supply runs, and the backyard gathering where ‘keep it classy’ was never a realistic fucking plan. Bring something to share. Your excellent restraint can stay home.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eMade to order:\u003c\/strong\u003e Your piece is created after checkout, so we are not sitting on piles of shit nobody asked for.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003ch3\u003eFeatures\u003c\/h3\u003e\u003cdiv\u003e- Fit: Loose\u003c\/div\u003e\u003cdiv\u003e- Neckline: Round Neck \/ O-Neck\u003c\/div\u003e\u003cdiv\u003e- Sleeve Style: Regular Sleeve\u003c\/div\u003e\u003cdiv\u003e- Sleeve Length: Short Sleeve\u003c\/div\u003e\u003cdiv\u003e- Season: Spring \/ Summer \/ Autumn\u003c\/div\u003e\u003cdiv\u003e- Style: Basics \/ Casual \/ Preppy \/ Sporty\u003c\/div\u003e\u003ch3\u003eCare Instructions\u003c\/h3\u003e\u003cdiv\u003e- Machine wash at 30°C (gentle cycle)\u003c\/div\u003e\u003cdiv\u003e- Do not bleach\u003c\/div\u003e\u003cdiv\u003e- Tumble dry low\u003c\/div\u003e\u003cdiv\u003e- Iron at low temperature, avoid ironing on print\u003c\/div\u003e\u003cdiv\u003e- Do not dry clean\u003c\/div\u003e\u003ch3\u003eFabric\u003c\/h3\u003e\u003cdiv\u003e- Material: 100% cotton\u003c\/div\u003e\u003cdiv\u003e- Fabric Weight: 260 gsm (7.7 oz)\u003c\/div\u003e\u003cdiv\u003e- Thickness: Moderate\u003c\/div\u003e\u003cdiv\u003e- Breathability: Moderate\u003c\/div\u003e\u003cdiv style=\"overflow-x:auto;\"\u003e\u003ctable id=\"size-guide\" style=\"width:100%;border-collapse:collapse;\"\u003e\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd colspan=\"2\" style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003eS\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd colspan=\"2\" style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003eM\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd colspan=\"2\" style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003eL\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd colspan=\"2\" style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003eXL\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd colspan=\"2\" style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e2XL\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd colspan=\"2\" style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e3XL\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003einch\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003ecm\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003einch\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003ecm\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003einch\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003ecm\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003einch\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003ecm\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003einch\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003ecm\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003einch\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003ecm\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003eLength\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e26.57\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e67.5\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e27.36\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e69.5\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e28.35\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e72\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e29.33\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e74.5\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e30.12\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e76.5\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e30.71\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e78\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003eShoulder\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e18.90\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e48\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e19.88\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e50.5\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e20.87\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e53\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e21.85\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e55.5\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e22.83\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e58\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e23.82\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e60.5\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003eChest\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e19.69\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e50\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e20.67\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e52.5\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e21.65\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e55\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e22.64\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e57.5\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e23.62\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e60\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e24.61\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e62.5\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003eSleeve length\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e8.46\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e21.5\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e8.66\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e22\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e8.86\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e22.5\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e9.06\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e23\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e9.25\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e23.5\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e9.45\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd style=\"padding:8px;border:1px solid #ddd;text-align:left;\"\u003e24\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\u003c\/table\u003e\u003c\/div\u003e","brand":"ODMPOD","offers":[{"title":"Wine Red \/ S","offer_id":67605227110714,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#025","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Wine Red \/ M","offer_id":67605227143482,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#026","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Wine Red \/ L","offer_id":67605227176250,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#027","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Wine Red \/ XL","offer_id":67605227209018,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#028","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Wine Red \/ 2XL","offer_id":67605227241786,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#029","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Wine Red \/ 3XL","offer_id":67605227274554,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#030","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White Gray \/ S","offer_id":67605227307322,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#019","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White Gray \/ M","offer_id":67605227340090,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#020","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White Gray \/ L","offer_id":67605227372858,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#021","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White Gray \/ XL","offer_id":67605227405626,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#022","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White Gray \/ 2XL","offer_id":67605227438394,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#023","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White Gray \/ 3XL","offer_id":67605227471162,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#024","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":67605227503930,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#001","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":67605227536698,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#002","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":67605227569466,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#003","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":67605227602234,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#004","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":67605227635002,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#005","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 3XL","offer_id":67605227667770,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#006","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy Blue \/ S","offer_id":67605227700538,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#013","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy Blue \/ M","offer_id":67605227733306,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#014","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy Blue \/ L","offer_id":67605227766074,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#015","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy Blue \/ XL","offer_id":67605227798842,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#016","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy Blue \/ 2XL","offer_id":67605227831610,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#017","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy Blue \/ 3XL","offer_id":67605227864378,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#018","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Coffee \/ S","offer_id":67605227897146,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#007","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Coffee \/ M","offer_id":67605227929914,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#008","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Coffee \/ L","offer_id":67605227962682,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#009","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Coffee \/ XL","offer_id":67605227995450,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#010","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Coffee \/ 2XL","offer_id":67605228028218,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#011","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Coffee \/ 3XL","offer_id":67605228060986,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#012","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Dark Gray \/ S","offer_id":67605228093754,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#031","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Dark Gray \/ M","offer_id":67605228126522,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#032","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Dark Gray \/ L","offer_id":67605228159290,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#033","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Dark Gray \/ XL","offer_id":67605228192058,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#034","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Dark Gray \/ 2XL","offer_id":67605228224826,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#035","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Dark Gray \/ 3XL","offer_id":67605228257594,"sku":"260930PODPQ7058#036","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/1021\/1373\/9066\/files\/15403672699194-back1-individual.png?v=1791125126","url":"https:\/\/therealshitco.com\/products\/essential-cotton-t-shirt-31","provider":"The Real Shit Co.","version":"1.0","type":"link"}